*taps mic, waits for feedback to die out* Hello? Is this thing on? Anybody still with me? Hellooooo there! Yes, it’s me! Ms AWOL! She Who Hasn’t Posted A Blog Entry Since 2021! How y’all doing? Are you surprised I’m still here? Yeah, so am I, not gonna lie. And yet here I am! I want to talk about why I’m crying…and then I’ll share some news. Hang on—not just “news,” but NEWS! So let’s get to it, shall we?